I just Want to Be Good at Something

My life has not really turned out the way I thought it would. Now, mind you, that's not all bad. It's mostly good. But life sure does give you some surprises along the way. Since fibro has inhibited my ability to hold down a "real" job....and since because of that it has inhibited my ability to bring in money for the household.....I started trying my hand at being "creative" to try and earn some money to help out. Being creative also seems to help me feel better ......if not always physically...it helps mentally. So, for the past couple of years I have been painting and decoupaging and crocheting. It made me feel so good. But I had a bad experience a year and a half ago when I had tried to become a part of a "community" of sorts and was told my items were not good enough to be included in this community. Needless to say I was crushed. It took me a long time to try again after that. And, I'm still recovering from it. I never feel confident anymore. But, today I took a step ......a step that was very hard for me to do. I put some of my "work" in a new little shop that is opening on Friday. The owner has made a big difference in my life with her encouragement. I still felt so nervous though. And looking around at all of the beautiful items in her store made me feel inadequate once again. I am not sure I fit in ...but I will keep you posted. I just want to be good at something.....I want to be good at something that no one else is. I want to be special and stand out because of my talent. Is that unrealistic? Fingers crossed that I can actually sell some items so I can feel productive again. And maybe that will help chase the depression away.