Read a comment from a Facebook friend this morning concerning dealing with her illness of fibromyalgia. She had the same experience as I have where some "Christian" has the nerve to tell you that if you were just closer to God and 'really' believed then He would heal you......
I told her....and wanted to share with all of you that I am learning to embrace my "suffering". The Lord suffered....and our suffering refines us like gold.
Another thought is that those of us with a chronic illness should try to refrain from constant whining and complaining. No one wants to hear how awful we feel all of the time......and I personally think that dwelling on it all of the time makes us feel worse.
We need to aattempt to deal with our trials with dignity and strength, even on those days where all we can do is stay in bed.
Thursday, April 7, 2011
Apologies
My last blog posted a few moments ago was listed as "offfensive' by Facebook. if i have offended someone I do apologize......that wasn't my intention....just writing about "my" experience......
Wondering whether it was the beer.....or the smell .....that was offensive....certainly it isn't Bob Segar......and hopefully not my age!! :)
oh well.......go figure........and the page FB sent me to wouldn't even allow me to connect with it so I could disagree.....
Wondering whether it was the beer.....or the smell .....that was offensive....certainly it isn't Bob Segar......and hopefully not my age!! :)
oh well.......go figure........and the page FB sent me to wouldn't even allow me to connect with it so I could disagree.....
TURN THE PAGE
Well, it's been a while since I have been "here". The last month was a hard one for me. A time a reflection and busyness for me. But I had an experience I wanted to share.
Tuesday night my husband and I attended a BobSegar concert in Cincinnati. My husband is a big fan and our kids went together and got him a ticket for his birthday...a floor seat ......and I got to go along.
At first I wasn't even sure I wanted to go.I'm 52.....I'm old......too old for this, I thought....even tho my hubby is 4 1/2 yrs older than me.And my body doesn't act like it should anymore with this fibro thingy. I just wasn't excited about it.In fact I have only been to one other concert in my life....and that was a Bob Segar concert 28 years ago!!
And then it hit me...."what would seeking eccentricity do??? What about my "inner swan" ....... so I went ....knowing that since we would be in Cinci I would at the least get to see some of my kids :)
Well, let me tell you ..even though I am "paying for it" today with tiredness and pain......IT WAS SO WORTH IT!!
Mostly everyone their was "our" age.....it was so neat to see the older, gray hair, pot belly set altogether in one place.....having a great time. There were even "older" fans there....our son affectionately called it the "depends and walkers generation". Afterall, bob himself is 65 and he moved like a youngster "up there on the stage". pun intended.........
The guy sitting next to us asked for everyone's years they had graduated from high school. Which started a converstaion and we actually found out we had a mutual acquaintance. What a small world.
Songs that we knew by heart decades ago came back to us.....and for me took on new meanings. Like "Against the Wind".....the verse says "I'm older now and still running against the wind" means alot more to me today than it did 28 yrs ago.......it's so true......older.......hmmmmm......
The whole crowd sang along......everyone was either clapping or singing or "swaying with the music"....pun intended :)
We all felt like kids again.....the way we felt before the stress of family and jobs aged us.....before we had to learn to be "practical" and "grown up" and "responsible"......
We had some beer.......we smelled "that" smell in the air......reminds me of another song...."oh, what's that smell".....lol...we bought t-shirts......and someone had a beach ball we were hitting around......
For 3 hours I was young again.....and now I feel like maybe being "our' age isn't such a bad thing afterall.......We are all in this together.
I heard a popular song the other day that says"everyone dies, but not everyone lives".......count me as one who wants to live.
Have a great day everyone.....and don't forget to "TURN THE PAGE"!!
Tuesday night my husband and I attended a BobSegar concert in Cincinnati. My husband is a big fan and our kids went together and got him a ticket for his birthday...a floor seat ......and I got to go along.
At first I wasn't even sure I wanted to go.I'm 52.....I'm old......too old for this, I thought....even tho my hubby is 4 1/2 yrs older than me.And my body doesn't act like it should anymore with this fibro thingy. I just wasn't excited about it.In fact I have only been to one other concert in my life....and that was a Bob Segar concert 28 years ago!!
And then it hit me...."what would seeking eccentricity do??? What about my "inner swan" ....... so I went ....knowing that since we would be in Cinci I would at the least get to see some of my kids :)
Well, let me tell you ..even though I am "paying for it" today with tiredness and pain......IT WAS SO WORTH IT!!
Mostly everyone their was "our" age.....it was so neat to see the older, gray hair, pot belly set altogether in one place.....having a great time. There were even "older" fans there....our son affectionately called it the "depends and walkers generation". Afterall, bob himself is 65 and he moved like a youngster "up there on the stage". pun intended.........
The guy sitting next to us asked for everyone's years they had graduated from high school. Which started a converstaion and we actually found out we had a mutual acquaintance. What a small world.
Songs that we knew by heart decades ago came back to us.....and for me took on new meanings. Like "Against the Wind".....the verse says "I'm older now and still running against the wind" means alot more to me today than it did 28 yrs ago.......it's so true......older.......hmmmmm......
The whole crowd sang along......everyone was either clapping or singing or "swaying with the music"....pun intended :)
We all felt like kids again.....the way we felt before the stress of family and jobs aged us.....before we had to learn to be "practical" and "grown up" and "responsible"......
We had some beer.......we smelled "that" smell in the air......reminds me of another song...."oh, what's that smell".....lol...we bought t-shirts......and someone had a beach ball we were hitting around......
For 3 hours I was young again.....and now I feel like maybe being "our' age isn't such a bad thing afterall.......We are all in this together.
I heard a popular song the other day that says"everyone dies, but not everyone lives".......count me as one who wants to live.
Have a great day everyone.....and don't forget to "TURN THE PAGE"!!
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
Monday, March 14, 2011
Life is So Hard.....How Do I get My Joy Back?
This past week has been one I hope I won't ever have to repeat.
First...I was at three different funeral homes this week. Once is too much.
One funeral was for a dear family member who passed away at 84. It's hard, but in your head you reason it out thinking that they had a long and happy life.
The other two were for people my age. THAT'S NOT SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN!! Right? Why does it seem that more and more people my age are dying. I guess it is because I am getting older, but this is not fair.
It is so hard to see people you care about hurting so much. My heart breaks for them.
And I help take care of an elderly family member whose dementia is getting worse. One day she lashed out at me for no reason. I realize it is just her condition, but it still hurts.
And I tried out a new job....that was just going to be too much for me....and I gave it up.....
And several of my loved one are dealing with health issues.....
And.....my joy is gone.....my depression has won. I could sit and just cry forever.
How do I get my joy back? How do I enjoy my life once again? I feel overwhelmed and defeated.
Life is just one big chore right now. Everyday is hard. Each moment a struggle for me.
Even the normal every day routine gets to be too much.....bills, and schedules....fix up projects and messes....responsibilities and worries.
I am tired. Stop world, I want to get off!! If I cry "uncle" will you let me alone for awhile??
I wonder if I can even keep on going. I try to look forward to things......but most of those times involve my family who all live too far away from me.
My joy is gone. Now what do I do?
First...I was at three different funeral homes this week. Once is too much.
One funeral was for a dear family member who passed away at 84. It's hard, but in your head you reason it out thinking that they had a long and happy life.
The other two were for people my age. THAT'S NOT SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN!! Right? Why does it seem that more and more people my age are dying. I guess it is because I am getting older, but this is not fair.
It is so hard to see people you care about hurting so much. My heart breaks for them.
And I help take care of an elderly family member whose dementia is getting worse. One day she lashed out at me for no reason. I realize it is just her condition, but it still hurts.
And I tried out a new job....that was just going to be too much for me....and I gave it up.....
And several of my loved one are dealing with health issues.....
And.....my joy is gone.....my depression has won. I could sit and just cry forever.
How do I get my joy back? How do I enjoy my life once again? I feel overwhelmed and defeated.
Life is just one big chore right now. Everyday is hard. Each moment a struggle for me.
Even the normal every day routine gets to be too much.....bills, and schedules....fix up projects and messes....responsibilities and worries.
I am tired. Stop world, I want to get off!! If I cry "uncle" will you let me alone for awhile??
I wonder if I can even keep on going. I try to look forward to things......but most of those times involve my family who all live too far away from me.
My joy is gone. Now what do I do?
Sunday, March 6, 2011
Why................
Sometimes things happen in life that we do not understand. Things happen in life that we have no control over.
And the question people have been asking for years is "why do bad things happen to good people"?
Sometimes we pray and it seems like God isn't listening. Then we question does he even care? If He did then things would be different.
And, I am asking "Why" tonight.
Nope, I don't have any answers....I wish I did....but I don't...
I am just here.....in a dark place.....with lots of questions.
How does a person go about getting their joy back? How do you ever feel like you used to?
Life is so hard sometimes that days like these make you question going on......
And yet, friends remind me that God, the Higher Power....has a reason for everything......
But you know...for the life of me I am not sure what the reason is......
And the question people have been asking for years is "why do bad things happen to good people"?
Sometimes we pray and it seems like God isn't listening. Then we question does he even care? If He did then things would be different.
And, I am asking "Why" tonight.
Nope, I don't have any answers....I wish I did....but I don't...
I am just here.....in a dark place.....with lots of questions.
How does a person go about getting their joy back? How do you ever feel like you used to?
Life is so hard sometimes that days like these make you question going on......
And yet, friends remind me that God, the Higher Power....has a reason for everything......
But you know...for the life of me I am not sure what the reason is......
Thursday, March 3, 2011
Dealing With Chronic Illness
Just returned from a visit to the doctor.
I hate doctor's visits. I hate sitting there telling him all of my troubles. I hate whiners. I don't want to be a whiner......but that's what I feel like.
I try to keep going everyday......to do what I need to do....but some days it is very hard.
I hate feeling bad everyday. I hate not being able to do what I want to do when I want to.
I hate feeling like I am letting everyone down because I can't hold down a job or because I can't keep up with housework.
I HATE IT! I HATE IT!
I am determined not to let this "thing" ruin me......but how?
I hate doctor's visits. I hate sitting there telling him all of my troubles. I hate whiners. I don't want to be a whiner......but that's what I feel like.
I try to keep going everyday......to do what I need to do....but some days it is very hard.
I hate feeling bad everyday. I hate not being able to do what I want to do when I want to.
I hate feeling like I am letting everyone down because I can't hold down a job or because I can't keep up with housework.
I HATE IT! I HATE IT!
I am determined not to let this "thing" ruin me......but how?
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